The type of friends you should *Value*

1. If they don't feel like hanging out, they wont make up a lame excuse...they'll say it like it is. "I'm tired...and don't feel like it"...."I have not been able to spend enough time with my husband/boyfriend/kids"..."I have something else going on, I just can't make it". these are all REAL reasons. If a friend doesn't "over-elaborate" they are usually being honest...a friend apologizes multiple times, because they truly would love to be around you, but just can't muster up the time, energy or something truly came up. A FAKE response would be "I forgot I have this appointment with my foot doctor because you know I have that weird fungus...it's been bothering me again, and I'd really like to make it, but i just can't"..."I'm sorry, but we have this dinner we are going to with these really important people my husband works for, and i really should be there, because the last time there were one of these ,I didn't go, and I'm not sure what time it will be done so I don't think I can make it". Do you see the difference? when someone is being straight up with you, they give you simple reasons, not huge story lines. (well, unless they are just "over-sharring" type of people.) They're honest...however blunt it may seem...they mean the 100 "I'm sorry's"...Someone is usually as apologetic as many times as they try to apologize. also, REAL friends who want to hang out will "take a rain check"...express plans to hang out soon...or attempt to re-schedule.
2. This goes hand in hand with #1. a friend who tells you like it is. A real friend will say you look good in a dress you KNOW you look good in. If you purchased this hot little Red Dress you had to work out 2 hours every day to fit into...and she tells you it's not flattering, she's jealous. If you're iffy about it, and she says she's iffy about it too...she's telling you the truth. your gut feeling is usually right...We girls usually just ask each other the "does it look good" question for confirmation. We want a complement. now if your are like "what do you think...I feel like it's not the best color on me"(and you really feel that way)...She'll probably agree. A GOOD friend wants you to go out and SHUT IT DOWN. ;)
3. Someone you have things in common with....not that you both like to shop, you like the color pink, you like the same alcoholic beverage and Mexican food.... THESE things are ALL TOO COMMON...if this were the case ALL WOMEN would be BFFS! I'm talking substantial stuff...you both enjoy period flicks, your both into community service, you enjoy the same line of work, you are both into the outdoors, you both enjoy a sense of adventure, and ONE HUGE BFF GREEN LITE: YOU LIKE and DISLIKE the same people...(people who are a lot alike tend to get turned off by the same type of people)
4. You don't have to be at some HUGE EVENT or some FIESTA like atmosphere in order to have fun. you can enjoy a cup of coffee together, you can go see a movie together or just plain sit and loose track of time talking on your couch/
5. Someone who is self sacrificing. This one is IMPORTANT...if you want to go see "Kittens on Ice" and she (an avid Cat hater)..says "okay, but next time you OWE me one"...or if your in a jam, and she offers to help out even though it's a huge inconvenience to her. She's true blue!
6. A good friend doesn't tell you what you WANT to hear...she'll tell you what you NEED to hear.
7. Someone who is genuine tends to admit or at least allude to THEIR faults. (and not just with situations with you)...if she often says stuff like: "I was so mad at what my sister said, but I do tend to antagonize her a bit"..." He really knows how to piss me off, but I tend to push his buttons sometimes too" or "Well, you know how bratty I can be"...Genuine people are their own harshest critics.
8. They won't let you walk all over them. A good friend doesn't mean a doormat. They will tell you if they disagree with you...or prefer to do something you might not like. It's HOW they communicate that to you. Example: "I'm thinking I might be allergic to "Kittens on Ice"...it's just not for me Cat Lady"... as apposed to "I DON'T want to see stupid "Kittens on Ice"...I'm over it, and you should be too...it's super kiddish...can't believe you STILL watch stuff like that"...the first phrase is playful and friendly...the second, attacking and an attempt to make a personal jab at your taste.
9. They worry about you....and not just because they NEED something. It's 12pm and you two were supposed to get together at 9. She hasn't heard from you (not even a text)...so she's called your cell phone, your home phone, e mailed you, Facebooked  you and by 2am with no response is close to calling the cops. REAL friends WORRY about the other friends well being. If ANY female has gone missing for more than 24 hrs...there's a problem...and if someone shrugs their shoulders at a "no show" with no communication after a few hours...you can bet they wouldn't be part of any "search party" if something DID happen to you.
10. This goes with number 9....aside from set plans, major events or set appointments where a true commitment has been made....there are NO EXPECTATIONS. If she says...I'll call you back in ten and doesn't call you back for an hour or two....it's no big deal...something must have come up. You invite her over for brunch, but cancels an hour before...you're friendship isn't in the shambles the next day. Sure you can be irritated...but you tell her, she explains herself an apology is exchanged, then your over it.  She doesn't expect you to answer your phone at 3am, because she found out Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson secretly got married...she'll appreciate the fact that you called her back when you got the first free moment you could the next day.