10. Alright, we ALL know P-Diddy, Puff Daddy, Diddy, Sean Combs, Doo-Dah, whatever his name is this week is gonna run out and get the NEW $60,000 SOLID gold cell phone...no joke, Luxury retailer Aesir came out with this. Word is: It doesn't do much...it's most advanced features seems to be speed dial and call waiting (ground breaking) but it's "pretty"...and GOLD...and my opinion: STUPID
9. Jersey Shore/ Teen/ Tween/ Text LINGO. It's a whole NEW language of "stupid"...everyone making a BFD over All this GTL...it's not making me wanna LOL anymore. No more OMG's with my BFFS....BRB I'll TTYL8. No wonder China is kicking our butt in education we are now too lazy to use real words.
8. THREE HOUR finales...so I'm a sucker for the Bachelor/ Bachelorette/ Bachelor Pad franchise.....but Really??? I gotta clear out 3 hours of my evening to find out what happens at the end of the season? My attention span maxes out at 2.5 ... 2 Hours of the show is filled with pointless fluff that commercials make out to be crucial to the outcome. At the end of the three hours, I wished I had waited until the TIVO finished the record so I can fast forward Chris Harrison's commentary and Jake Pevelka's 4th shot at his 15 minutes of fame. Why does this guy keep getting air time??? BTW (by the way in Text lingo)
7. Sample sale web sites that showcase SOLD OUT STUFF. Can we not toy with my emotions...Don't send out an e-mail blast about 75% off Phillip Lim with a picture of a gorgeous sequin pencil skirt attached, to lead me to a bunch of "SOLD OUTS" stamped across every last variation of the skirt. False advertisement...I just wasted 5 minutes of valuable "app shopping time".
6. Head to toe matching sweat suits! (Ala Victoria Secret Pink)...Stop wearing them out in public...you look like a Popsicle. In the comfort of your own home it's fine to look like a Lisa Frank Pencil case, but it's just not appropriate to go to dinner in. You're not 14 and heading to soccer practice after grabbing a fro-yo with your boyfriend.
5. Colored contacts. God gave you beautiful eyes...the better to see you with. I'll admit I played around with these in my late teens...I inevitably lived to regret EVERYTHING in my late teens. Embrace your eyes...enhance your natural eye color through different colored eye shadows and eye liner. Guess what! God is GREAT at color coordinating...so YOUR eye color IS NATURALLY the color that goes best with your skin tone and facial features.
4. Men who go on "auto pilot" when the women of the house isn't home. Some men (not mine of course...lol) tend to get amnesia the minute you leave. They forget that there's trash that needs to be taken out, hampers to put dirty clothes in, dishes to clean...and lights to turn off. I'll bet you, if you video taped your husband/ live in boyfriend's habits when you're gone for a weekend...you'd come home to find you've taped a three ring circus. Some men just can't function responsibly when the estrogen leaves the room.
3. Celebs with new found accents. Like Madonna...who became British overnight...then it just kinda stuck... Paris Hilton who has a normal deeper yet feminine voice, but sounds like a member of the Lolly Pop Guild anytime she's on camera.
2. Celeb kids wearing Expensive stuff. Your kid will grow out of it in a month...there are children starving all over the world...and you buy your kid $100.00 Jesus Sandals??? Really?! Hit up Baby Gap like a normal sensible parent, and donate the $79.50 you DIDN'T spend to charity.
1. Missoni for Target Mania..I already posted how "Zombie Dumb" everyone is acting over this line...no need to re-rant...yet it still EARNS this week's spot as #1 STUPID.
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